I have to admit I have thought briefly that the ice bucket challenge was wasting water…when Matt Damon did it with toilet water I thought it was a great message. In saying that I don’t think it’s the end of the world. I think it’s for good cause. I think that the people reactions are sometimes melodramatic but I’m just guessing lol. In the end I don’t really see the harm, if you’re thinking it’s wasting water, that there are other “real” or more important problems going on in the world than throwing cold water on yourself or someone else….that’s true but it’s brought attention, it’s raised money, awareness, it’s made people laugh and smile, feel cared about…and yes shriek lol but what’s wrong with having that moment or any moment of happiness or whatever. I know personally I deal with a lot of anxiety that’s very overwhelming when it comes to everything. I end up in ERs, in bed, or the doctor, or my therapist office or even in this delightful place I call treatment that was in fact a rehab for eating disorders bc I get panic attacks, I get crazy anxiety and overwhelmed. I can even function. I grieve fully for people I’ve never met, I worry endlessly about things I can’t change that a way beyond my control and all of that overtakes me….and I hear over and over on repeat from people including my husband who desperately wants me to understand I can’t do that, I can’t be that person bc then I can’t help anyone at all including my own children. But I say to all of those people - it’s selfish to look away, to not hurt, not feel pain, to not want to change it, to not be anxious over it, not be consumed by all the really awful things in this world if I’m that person then I’m selfish, I don’t care and that’s not me and if I did in that way look away, or not think about it, or want to change it, not cry, not hurt and not know it’s nothing compared to those living it I would like me even less than I already do and if the world had more people who didn’t look away maybe it’d be a better place. DO YOU KNOW WHAT EVERY THERAPIST I’VE EVER HAD SAID TO THAT - THEY SAID “OR MAYBE EVERYONE WOULD BE LIKE YOU SICK, MIGRAINES, DEPRESSED, CRAZY ANXIOUS, OBSESSED WITH CONTROLLING ANYTHING YOU CAN AND THE THINGS YOU CAN’T and make it to where you are this place unable to in fact help anyone bc you can’t help yourself.” The truth is it’s about balance and I haven’t found that balance yet….and I fight myself on it a lot thinking what’s selfish and what’s not. I think about this a lot (I overthink everything) certainly when I pray and I try my hardest to remember everyone and everything I can think of that I think God needs to know - even though if I miss someone in reality I know God can read my heart and knows if I miss saying it doesn’t mean I don’t care- I still think of it as I go down that list constantly and remember someone or thing when I’m done what a horrid person I am and please know that doesn’t mean I didn’t care or don’t think it’s less important than the rest. In the end I don’t think it’s worst the thing in the world or even a bad thing if people experience happiness whenever they can bc it’s fleeting and if you have to experience all feelings sadness, fear, anger all of that to appreciate the good or great times….and I don’t think any of those people watching or doing it are really hurting anyone or doing anything wrong. It doesn’t mean they don’t care, or have no idea what pain, fear, or sadness is.